"Secure That Building"

Like it or not, but there are basic differences between the branches of the United States Armed Services.

If you give the command "SECURE THAT BUILDING", to a sailor, a soldier, a Marine and an airman, here is what each of the different services will do to carry out that order:

The NAVY will turn out the lights and lock the doors.

The ARMY will surround the building with defensive fortifications, tanks and concertina wire.

The MARINE CORPS will assault the building, killing everyone inside using overlapping fields of fire from all appropriate points on the perimeter.

The AIR FORCE would take out a three-year lease with an option to buy the building.

And you Sand Crabs (Navy jargon for civilians) think I'm kidding. Boy, have I got news for you.